My Wife and Kids

With Jay out of town for six weeks, Michael takes on sole parenting duties — and soon finds himself struggling to make all three kids happy.

Michael has plenty on his plate as Claire's friend Charmaine looks to him for serious advice and Junior's basketball buddies turn out to be bullies.

When the kids complain about the house rules, Michael agrees to take them away for a week — as well as all the parental care that comes with them.

Jay's still away and the kids are getting sick of Michael, so they each dream up their own ideas of what the perfect dad would look like.

Michael struggles with a change in Jay's appearance and seeks help from a mental health professional — who has his own ideas about what's wrong.

When Michael learns that Claire intends to go to a party without his permission, he concocts a plan to catch her in the act.

After Michael has trouble going to the bathroom, Jay encourages him to take charge of his health and undergo a colonoscopy.

The kids play a game in which Junior and Kady dare Claire to eat their dad's special — and jealously guarded — slice of pie while he's sleeping.

Jay brings Kady and Claire along for "Take Your Daughters to Work Day," only for her to receive an unpleasant surprise while at the office.

Jay buys tech upgrades for Junior, spurring an argument with Michael. Things go awry when they kiss and make up, unaware that Junior's webcam is on.

Michael struggles to deal with a pesky neighbor, Claire's new love interest and Kady's class hamster, who meets an unfortunate fate under his care.

Michael insists the kids become entrepreneurs. Kady starts a lemonade stand, Claire opens a beauty salon, and Junior becomes a professional gambler.

Jay worries about the state of her relationship with Michael when he gets obsessed with trying to beat a new video game.

Michael attempts to rally the family to get to his cousin's wedding on time. He soon realizes the Kyles might be a lost cause.

Jay hopes to educate the kids on the country's forefathers, so the Kyles hit the road to visit Paul Revere's house. But the trip doesn't go as planned.

After quarreling with a man at a gas station, Michael takes his family out to eat at a restaurant — but the evening is far from pleasant.

The Kyles' night at the restaurant gets even worse when they're seated next to an incredibly irksome family. Michael is shocked to see a familiar face.

When Michael learns that Claire plans to go out with her crush, Tony, he insists that he and Jay come along on their date too.

Michael tries to ease tensions between his parents, who aren't on speaking terms. But tempers rise over dinner, resulting in a major family spat.

Signs of aging spur Michael to take up boxing to preserve his youth. Meanwhile, Junior misunderstands a conversation between Claire and Tony.

Michael becomes Kady's soccer coach when she complains about Jay's tyrannical leadership. To Michael's surprise, Jay starts coaching an opposing team.

After Jay reaches a breaking point with unemployment, Michael hires her to help out around the office, only to soon regret his decision.

Junior's IQ test results leave his parents dumbfounded. Michael struggles to put together a jungle gym. Kady aspires to be a hall monitor.

When the family makes fun of Michael about hurting his back during a game of Twister, he plays up the injury to try to teach them a lesson.

A run-in with a glamorous high school classmate pushes Jay to revamp her look. Junior makes the basketball team and takes on a risky initiation task.

The Kyles run into their old nemeses, the Tylers, at the bowling alley. As the families go head-to-head, Junior finds common ground with their daughter.

Disaster strikes for Claire ahead of picture day at school. Junior gets his license and ignores his dad's advice on what car to buy.

Ahead of the Kyles' wedding anniversary, Michael tells Jay that he plans to go golfing that day. Meanwhile, Claire experiences heartbreak.

Believing that Michael forgot their anniversary, Jay drinks away her sorrows. Later, Michael faces disappointment in an online auction.

The Kyles fly to Hawaii for what's supposed to be a relaxing getaway, but nothing goes as planned. Michael shows off his goofy dance moves at a luau.

The Hawaiian vacation heats up as Junior goes on a date, Claire indulges in a lot of room service, and Jay reveals her ambitious itinerary.

The family's trip to paradise ends on a stressful note when Michael learns that their flight home leaves a lot sooner than he thought.

Jay signs Michael up for samba lessons in an effort to spice up their date nights, but a flirtatious instructor causes friction between them.

Jay finds Claire's diary while tidying her room and grapples with its racy content. Junior gets an impromptu driving lesson from Michael.

Claire trades her clean-cut boyfriend for an edgier guy who quickly gets on Michael's nerves. Junior draws a somewhat unflattering family portrait.

Jay offers to direct Kady's kindergarten class play, but her demanding approach soon gets on everyone's nerves. Can a freewheeling Michael save the day?

Tired of Claire and Junior's persistent bickering, Michael and Jay cook up a plan to show their kids that living among constant fighting is no fun.

All heck breaks loose when Michael's sister stays for the weekend and trades barbs with an increasingly miffed Jay. Will there ever be a truce?

Michael gives Junior some dating advice. Before long, the budding Romeo is torn between two girls — and must decide which to take to the school dance.

Creativity reigns at the Kyle house as Jay paints a revealing portrait of Michael, Claire designs jeans, Junior writes poetry, and Kady learns the piano.

Michael reconnects with an old pal who now uses a wheelchair after falling from a roof. Claire gets caught shoplifting, but is she the real culprit?

Jay convinces Michael to go to a couples seminar where doubts arise about the strength of their relationship. Junior's moneymaking scheme backfires.

Michael imparts knowledge while supervising Kady's sleepover. Claire and her new boyfriend hatch a plan to sneak out to a late-night dance party.

Tired of sitting through cartoons, Michael shows Kady a scary movie — with unfortunate results. A power outage helps the family bond.

Michael gets his hopes up when Jay nominates him for a prestigious award. Disaster strikes when Claire takes makeup from her mom's purse.

Hormones flare as Junior gets hot and heavy with his new girlfriend. Kady befriends a piano prodigy. Claire struggles with pre-exam nerves.

Michael exiles Junior to a tent in the backyard when he catches Junior in bed with his girlfriend. Jay steps in to mend the rift between father and son.

Jury duty awaits for Michael and Jay. With "The Godfather" on his mind, Michael mistakes a pushy insurance salesperson for a mobster.

When Claire and Junior both lay claim to a wallet containing $500, Michael decides it’s time for a session of "family court" to settle the matter.

Claire can't wait to drive after getting her learner's permit, but Michael isn't eager to teach her. So she takes matters into her own hands.

When Jay finds an old photo of Michael's ex-girlfriend among his keepsakes, she begins to panic about the state of their marriage.

In a bid to spend more time with Michael, Jay decides to watch her husband play golf. An unenthusiastic Junior begins thinking about college.

Claire and Tony announce that they are ready to have sex — causing panic for Michael and Jay. Will divine intervention save the day?

Michael and Jay agree to chaperone Claire to her senior prom, but they end up stealing the limelight. Junior needs some cash to fix up an old car.

Graduation nears and Junior wants to go to college — but first he has to impress in an interview. Claire and Kady can't wait for Junior to leave.

Concerned that Junior is rushing into big decisions, Michael and Jay encourage him to travel after graduation. But a revelation changes everything.

Junior tells his parents that he won't be going to Japan for a very good — and shocking — reason: Vanessa is pregnant.

Much to Michael's surprise, the hair-growth pills he gets from a friend seem to be working. But Jay isn't quite as impressed.

Instead of following Michael’s orders to clean the toilets on his first day of work, Junior gets the other employees to do his dirty work for him.

Jay announces that she’s going back to college to study psychology, but Michael doesn't like the idea of her spending time away from the family.

Vanessa's parents react badly when they learn about her pregnancy — and things don't go much better when they meet with Michael and Jay later.

Worried that Junior is too cavalier about the challenges of parenthood, Jay and Michael have him care for a water-filled balloon as if it were a baby.

Michael tells Junior to be less friendly and more assertive with the employees, but he has trouble following his own advice.

After Vanessa's first ultrasound, she and Junior decide to keep the sex of their baby a surprise, much to Michael's disappointment.

As Jay gets ready for her marathon, Michael claims that he's fit enough to run it with her — even though he hasn't trained for it at all.

With Jay and Michael out of the house at a concert, Claire secretly throws a party that quickly spins out of control.

After a chance reunion with an old friend who's now a jazz musician, Michael agrees to fill in on piano with the band — despite not knowing how to play.

Upset after finding condoms that fell out of Claire’s backpack, Michael makes things hard on Tony when he returns from a self-imposed purification exile.

When she finds some mice droppings in the kitchen, Jay wants to call an exterminator — but Michael insists on taking care of the problem himself.

In need of privacy, Junior decides it's time to move out of the garage. But getting his own place proves harder than he expected.

To one-up the other parents at a PTA meeting, Michael declares that the Kyle family will sell 5,000 candy bars for a school fundraiser... in one week.

After a solid year restoring his beloved 1964 Impala, Junior shocks everyone when he makes an impulsive — but commendable — decision.

Jay misses the mark with her wedding anniversary gift for Michael. Meanwhile, Claire tries to make her parents a celebratory dinner.

Instead of paying the fine for a traffic ticket, Michael contests it in court. But his strange new smile gets him in even deeper trouble.

After scoring tickets to see LeBron James' first game against the Knicks, Michael pulls out all the stops to avoid catching the flu before the event.

While sitting in the silence of a child-free house, Jay and Michael look back on all the ups and downs they've experienced as parents.

Michael and Jay continue to reminisce about all the adventures they've had with the kids — and each other — over the years.

When Vanessa's mother kicks her father out of the house, he goes to stay with the Kyles, but he quickly wears out his welcome.

Against his better judgment, Michael gives Calvin a job at his trucking company, then spends the next few days figuring out how to fire him.

Hoping to ease Jay's stress, Michael reserves a relaxing getaway at a resort and spa. But he soon discovers he'll need a backup plan.

After accidentally taping over a video of Kady taking her first steps, Michael desperately tries to make things right before Jay finds out.

Jay starts to feel left out when the temporary housekeeper she hires does a better job than her — even at making peach cobbler!

Michael barges in on Claire's modeling audition and confronts the agent, who tells him he'd make a perfect hand model. Could a career change be in store?

Jasmine and Calvin join the Kyles for a game night that quickly spirals, especially when Michael suggests the couples test how well they know each other.

Shocked when Vanessa announces that she wants to give birth at home, Michael and Jay agree to meet with Summer Breeze, Vanessa's midwife.

Stuck without a car, the family must navigate delivering a baby at home when Vanessa unexpectedly goes into labor.

Michael can't contain his excitement about attending Michael Jordan's basketball camp in Las Vegas. His family members find reasons to come along.

Michael finagles his way into a game of one-on-one with Michael Jordan. Franklin helps Jay win at blackjack, and a magician makes Junior disappear.

After flunking it the first time, Michael needs to complete a childcare course for grandparents before Junior and Vanessa let him babysit again.

Michael prepares for a dance battle with an old rival at his and Jay's high school reunion, while Calvin helps Franklin deal with bullies at the park.

Junior discovers that holding his baby makes him super smart. Meanwhile, Kady blackmails Claire into becoming her servant.

After Jay crashes Michael's all-guys poker night, he decides to attend her ladies' book club meeting; Vanessa gets Junior a pager.

Junior's attempts to finally propose to Vanessa keep getting interrupted in unpredictable ways, while Michael and Jay both enter a karaoke contest.

Jay opens a soul food restaurant, but the couple who own the Chinese restaurant across the street will stop at nothing to sabotage her business.

Junior joins Bobby Shaw's sketchy school for rappers. Jay and Claire go to a yoga class with a hot instructor before Michael freestyle battles Bobby.

Junior and Vanessa decide they want to have a simple wedding in two weeks. But when Michael and Jay take over the planning, things get complicated fast.

When Jay tells Michael she doesn't feel appreciated, he overcompensates to make her feel otherwise. Meanwhile, Franklin tries to grow taller.

Vanessa buys Junior a foosball table, but it's Michael who takes his obsession with the game to an obnoxious new level.

When Michael proves to be an unsuccessful tutor for Jay, he tries to convince her professor to give her another shot; Kady fancies herself a brainiac.

Jay wants Michael to buy her a lavish gift for a made-up holiday, but his strategy for determining how big of a gift to get doesn't go over very well.

Michael joins Jay on a silent meditation retreat, but keeping his mouth shut for the weekend presents a number of challenges — and opportunities.

The Kyles go to the Bahamas for a relaxing vacation, but Michael's old buddy threatens the peace. Meanwhile, Claire has too many "Bahama Mama" cocktails.

Michael and Jay get stranded on an island and Jimmy is their only hope. Meanwhile, Junior makes a charming new friend, and Franklin meets his nemesis.

Michael is unsatisfied with the contractor bids on a remodel of their garage living space, so he, Junior and Franklin decide to do it themselves.

An old classmate inspires Michael to join a gym to firm up his body, and like everything else, he takes the endeavor a little too seriously.

Jay and Michael make a six-month celibacy pact in hopes that it'll spice up their long-term sex life, while Franklin and Kady plant an aphrodisiac.

Junior makes a cartoon based on the Kyle family that catches the attention of TV execs. Meanwhile, Claire wants more out of her relationship with Tony.

Michael gets invited to a last-minute all expenses paid golfing trip to Pebble Beach, but family obligations keep arising as he's trying to leave.

A pesky skin rash on her face is one of the many problems preventing Jay from looking her best for her college graduation ceremony.

Michael considers a lucrative offer for his trucking company, while Bobby Shaw makes an offer of his own; Claire and Kady fight over bathroom time.

On an RV trip to the Grand Canyon, the Kyles learn to coexist in close quarters, while Michael tries to break the record drive time from Connecticut.

Jay lobbies for Michael to get a vasectomy, but he proves hard to convince. Tony wants to make a hat that will help him stand out with God.